wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
