Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize