you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize