He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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