I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize