So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
