Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Randomize
