# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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