How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
