Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I have demons in me.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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