so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize
