Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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