You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Shame - the story of my life.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
