I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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