Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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