Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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