She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
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