Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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