come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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