If i come over, it means nothing
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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