i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Randomize
