Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
