just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
