highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
