i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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