dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize