Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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