I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
