never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
