omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
oh god the rape fog is back!
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Drunk is a universal language darling
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
