Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
