you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
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