BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
