so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
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