He is such a slut. More and more my type.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
