A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
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