wrigley field is MILF paradise
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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