I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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