ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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