She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Randomize