Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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