you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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