I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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