After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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