I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
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