OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize