Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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