Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Randomize
