no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
You have to summon your inner elephant
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize
