Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
