I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize