Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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