So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
